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Things to never ask another person - Les questions a ne jamais poser!

Conversation etiquette is a must in both personal and professional settings and you should never want to be perceived as rude, gauche, or insensitive when discussing with someone.

Always try to pause for a nano-second and ask yourself how does your question will make the other person feel? If it's embarrassed, uneasy, awkward, ashamed, you might want to rethink it.

So today, let's outline the top questions you shouldn't ask anyone, ever!

1) How old are you? Avoid asking someone how old they are if they look a day over 18 years old. Both men and women can be sensitive to this question and it's usually off-limit.

2) Have you gain weight? It's usually a hard enough truth, the only thing making it worst is knowing that other people noticed too. Refrain from discussing body changes (weight loss or gain) with any gender. It's insensitive and you never know if there is an underlying health issue that causes that.

- And on the same note, even if you see that a woman is obviously pregnant don't ask about it. If she tells you or starts talking about it, you can congratulate her but don't systematically assume that it's okay to ask "are you pregnant?!" (imagine if the answer is no..) and to start asking a million private details about the pregnancy or the baby. Some people are private, please keep that in mind and respect it.

3) Why are you still single? When are you getting married? When are you having kids?

These are incredibly intrusive and not justifiable to ask, ever. Even if it's to someone close to you, my advice would be to stay out of it.

Everyone moves through life to their own timing and on their own terms. Your ideal life, might not be theirs. Single people can be very very happy and fulfilled. Some people might want to get married when some don't. Some very happy couples just don't want to have kids sometimes. Some couples are just not able to conceive and this is hard enough without having to explain and justify themselves to you.

4) How much did that cost? Was it expensive?

If you asking this to a very close friend or your sister, for example, it's kind of okay but I would not ask this to an acquaintance or colleague. Just avoid money discussions altogether when possible. Please, promise me to never ask questions as "How much do you make?" "How much do your husband and yourself have in the bank?" "How much money do your parents have?" In any culture, money topics are better avoided. And if you're really curious about the cost of something, just google it privately.

5) Are those real??

Whether you're talking about diamonds, a piece of jewelry, a designer purse, a hair color, someone's breast (!!), refraiiiin yourself. Do I really need to say more?

6) Are you going to eat all of that? This one might make you smile now, but avoid judging the quantity of food someone is about to eat.

7) What do you do for a living? When this can come across as a normal and acceptable question in middle-class settings, I would avoid asking this question to someone from the upper-class. It can be perceived as intrusive or as a way to gauge how much money someone has or makes. Some people just don't "work" and have some types of more passive incomes. You'll most likely always get a vague answer from these types of people. Respect the fact that some just don't want to discuss what they do with strangers. If you really have to ask, it's better to phrase it as "What industry are you in?"

8) Do you believe in god? What religion are you? Who did you vote for?

As always, avoid religious and political topics, they're never welcome to a dinner party or in the workplace.

And there you have it!

Thanks for reading, Xoxo

En Francais :

Dans n'importe quelle conversation souvenez-vous que le but n'est jamais de mettre la personne en face de vous malalaise, triste ou embarrasée. Il y a des sujets qui sont simplement hors-limite.

Voici un petit article a propos des questions a ne jamais poser a une autre personne.

1) T'as quel age?

Un big non non, que ce soit pour une homme ou une femme. Genre, jamais.

2) T'as pris un peu de poids didonc?

Hum.. pardon?

L'exemple typique d'une micro-aggression a éviter. Que ce soit demandé d'un air innocent ou taquin, on évite. C'esy cruelle, et puis on ne sait jamais si la personne en question a des ennuis de santé etc..

Et dans la meme lignée, on évite de demander aux femmes si elles sont enceinte, meme quand on est 99% surs.

3) Pourquoi t'es toujours célibataire? Tu te marries quand, alors? Le bébé c'est pour quand?

C'est marrant comme on s'attend a ce que sa tante ou une vieille amie de la famille posent se genre de question mais jamais nos proches, proches. Et pourtant..

Eviter de vous incruster dans la vie des gens, meme si c'est parceque vous les aimez. Les relations sont parfois compliquées ou parfois simplement une personne est tres bien toute seule. Il y a des couples tres heureux qui ne veulent pas d'enfants. Et puis aussi des couples qui ne peuvent pas en avoir. C'est suffisemment pénible que d'avoir en plus a se justifier et expliquer.

4) Ca t'a couté combien?? C'était cher?

Meme si cette question passe avec les amis proches ou la famille, on évite de demander aux connaissances ou aux collegues. Les discussions ou il est question d'argent sont un peu délicates.

5) C'est du vrai?

Que ce soit a propos d'un bijoux, d'un sac haute couture, d'une couleur de cheveux ou encore de la poitrine de quelqu'un (!!), on éviiiite. Faut vraiment que j'explique plus en detail?

6) Tu vas vraiment manger tout ca?

On embarrasse pas les potes qui aiment manger

7) Tu fais quoi dans la vie?

Meme si a la base c'est une question plutot innocente, elle souvent associée avec le fait de juger combien quelqu'un gagne ou combien d'argent il/elle peut avoir. Il est préferable de demander : "Vous etes dans quel industrie?" C'est un peu moins intrusif

8) Tu crois en Dieu? T'es de quel religion? T'as vote pour qui aux dernieres elections?

Comme toujours, on evite...


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